Why monogamy is ridiculous

So sad I can't see the video.

While in the minority a lot of animals are monogamous too. So... Umm... Guess it is horses for courses.

I'm loyal by nature. I don't change jobs often. I have no problem keeping commitments. I have no problem sacrificing for others and I much prefer to get to know something inside and out than swap to whatever is new and shiny and really only scratch the surface. Monogamy is a perfect fit in my life and I married someone who feels exactly the same way.

The only thing I find ridiculous is someone telling me that I shouldn't be monogamous because they don't feel it is the best fit for their life.

Would just like to note that monogamy is not the absence of sexual attraction to people other than your partner. Monogamy is not acting on that attraction.

This is a hard one for me right now because I'm anti-sex right now. I've found it to be a pleasant distraction at best and a poisonous dalliance at worst.

For society, our standards will organically change over time. I do not support nor speak against the general populace moving toward more hanky-panky with less restriction. Should it happen we may be showing more honesty with ourselves if that is the direction we go, but that is neither here nor there.

Personally, I don't want to have sex with anyone. I don't want the hassle of everyone being different, having different needs, different expectations(both immediate and long term) and me trying to jump through hoops so that nobody is pissed off and everyone is satisfied. That is a game that never ends and is a colossal waste of time, let alone the emotional and mental ringer it puts me through(regardless of the "types" or "attitudes" present. There is ALWAYS crap I have to wade through).

An orgasm is a temporary need my body has and I see no reason not to just take care of it as fast as possible and not involve anybody else when the need arises.

Now...I am getting divorced at the end of the month after a very long relationship, so it may be peppering my opinion, but to put that in perspective, we have been "separated" for over two years now and I haven't once had sex during that time(let alone outside of our marriage).

I just think it is way more useful to put that intensity and long term focus on something more productive than a chemical release I can induce on my own.

I wonder if there are any drugs aimed at taming sexual appetite. Traumatic experiences seem to work a charm, but come with a lot of other problems. With feminists being obsessed with rape, the male gaze and whatnot you'd think such a thing would have been created by now....


My wife and I have had an agreement for many years now: we tell. In the end there's nothing to tell and we don't really find other people attractive, or at least not to the point of making the effort of sleeping with them. In libertine environments things are different of course, it's just extra kink that gets "integrated" into our relationship.... And then again she's far more interested in exhib than anything else.... In her country monogamous people seem to be a minority, and with all the STDs going around, sleeping around is kind of a turn off for her, whereas I lost interest in non-sluts when I was still a kid, so i haven't bothered with a regular girl/woman in a really long time.

ren wrote: With feminists being obsessed with rape

I don't know how you've made it 6 years on any website with such a lack of class.

Really?

edit: apologies. I won't be responding to this obvious troll again.

so i may share to much information here but frankly i am ok with it and what has worked for me may not for others.

My boyfriend and I have been in an open relationship now for two of the 5 years we have been together. I think it has helped us because we aren't making each other be everything to one another. It has made us closer because we know that should we sleep with someone else that thats ok as long as we are safe and in the end its the two of us that matter.

My husband and I has an "Open Relationship" agreement. I trust him and trust that he will be smart and responsable to me and his daughters. He trusts me equally. He can and has and does have his side attractions. I....don't. For a couple reasons.

For the most part....it works for us.

It might not for others.

Do what works for you and your partner.

ren wrote: I wonder if there are any drugs aimed at taming sexual appetite. Traumatic experiences seem to work a charm, but come with a lot of other problems. With feminists being obsessed with rape, the male gaze and whatnot you'd think such a thing would have been created by now....

What an incredibly insensitive and frankly appalling point of view. Do you not have a shred of empathy? I am an Army Veteran, I am a male, and I am a feminist. Feminist means that you believe in equality, which, the last time I checked, is a part of the Jedi way.

Edit:

Found it in the Doctrine, "In a society that does not discriminate on the basis of sexual orientation or circumstances of birth such as gender, ethnicity and national origin."

hiddeninthesnow wrote:

ren wrote: With feminists being obsessed with rape

I don't know how you've made it 6 years on any website with such a lack of class.

Really?

edit: apologies. I won't be responding to this obvious troll again.

Ermm....Not sure how this was trolling? What he said was true.

And yes, Ren...There are ways to suppress sex... Not that many would want to do that haha

hiddeninthesnow wrote: I won't be responding to this obvious troll again.

I don't see ren as a troll. Far from it. I think you will find that the comment is a reference to one of the feminists rape topics that came up some time ago. At least that is the way I took it.

Apparently females raping men is not that uncommon and they use a drug to do so. Who knew? Well I didn't anyway. The things you learn at TOTJO.