Surviving a Zombie Attack

By Leah Starspectre

October 29, 2016

We’ve all heard about people who prepare for the zombie apocalypse: stockpiling food, collecting weapons, fortifying their homes...just in case things go wrong and suddenly they’re faced with an onslaught of the undead. Little do they know that the zombie invasion has already begun. It’s no apocalypse, though. Zombies have always been around. We meet them everyday.

They’re here - and they’re hungry.

These zombies aren’t created by a super-secret biological weapon, or a rogue virus or an ancient spell. They’re infected by pain: anger, frustration, envy, hatred, resentment, and fear. This infection causes them to turn on and attack those around them at the slightest provocation. One bite can infect you, and soon, you too will become a fearful creature, driven by intense need and feral instinct.

If you’re bitten by a zombie, their pain transfers to you. That’s how the infection spreads. You will want to retaliate, to defend yourself. And if you do...slowly, slowly, the infection will fester and seep into your mind, taking over. You too will feel threatened all the time and start lashing out at people around you. And before you know it, you’re a zombie yourself, shuffling through life, reacting blindly to perceived threats. That’s no life for a Jedi.

There is good news, though!  There is a surefire cure for a zombie attack! And the antidote is something that you can keep in your Jedi utility belt, ready to be administered anywhere, any time.

If you’re bitten by a zombie, and you feel the pain and anger start to course through your veins, the first thing to do is to curb your reaction - don’t retaliate! Remember your Jedi training! Zombies are creatures of fragile constitutions and will attack again if threatened or feeling vulnerable. You can’t cure a zombie, no matter how much you may want to, but you can protect yourself from infection. Keep a safe distance if you’re bitten, and allow the zombie to regain their sense of safety.

Remember, a zombie is a wounded being, so you can practice compassion (which should already be in your utility belt) by not making their pain worse, or giving them a reason to remain angry or afraid. Sometimes, that may be removing yourself completely from their vicinity. If appropriate, you can even offer them an alternative to biting you. Maybe a hug, or a cookie, or a listening ear? It depends on your relationship with the zombie. Despite their aggression and suffering, zombies are our brothers and sisters in the Force.

Once you are no longer in danger of a renewed attack, you can see to your injuries. A zombie bite is painful, but isn’t fatal, so you don’t have to worry on that account. Instead, you must keep in mind that the zombie didn’t attack you because you’re a bad person, or because you deserved it somehow. Intense feelings of loss, denial, and injustice are what drives a zombie’s need to feed. The key to preventing a full infection is realizing that you can’t control the zombie attacks, but you CAN control your reaction to them. And once you can feel the deep peace of forgiveness and loving kindness towards a zombie who attacked you, you know you’re safe from infection.

No amount of preparation or fortifying can shield you from zombie attacks completely, they are simply too many that exist in our lives. However, as Jedi, we can use our training to equip our utility belts with enough self-control and compassion to prevent the spread of infection.