Oxymorons
21 Dec 2009 15:16 #27194
by Garm
1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
6. Why does \"slow down\" and \"slow up\" mean the same thing?
7. Why does \"fat chance\" and \"slim chance\" mean the same thing?
8. Why do \"tug\" boats push their barges?
9. Why do we sing \"Take me out to the ball game\"
when we are already there?
10. Why are they called \"stands\" when they are made for sitting?
11. Why is it called \"after dark\" when it really is \"after light\"?
12. Doesn't \"expecting the unexpected\" make the unexpected expected?
13. Why are a \"wise man\" and a \"wise guy\" opposites?
14. Why do \"overlook\" and \"oversee\" mean opposite things?
15. Why is \"phonics\" not spelled the way it sounds?
16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?
21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control
when you know the batteries are dead?
22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?
24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?
27. Christmas, what other time of the year do you sit in front of a
dead tree, and eat candy out of your socks?
2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
6. Why does \"slow down\" and \"slow up\" mean the same thing?
7. Why does \"fat chance\" and \"slim chance\" mean the same thing?
8. Why do \"tug\" boats push their barges?
9. Why do we sing \"Take me out to the ball game\"
when we are already there?
10. Why are they called \"stands\" when they are made for sitting?
11. Why is it called \"after dark\" when it really is \"after light\"?
12. Doesn't \"expecting the unexpected\" make the unexpected expected?
13. Why are a \"wise man\" and a \"wise guy\" opposites?
14. Why do \"overlook\" and \"oversee\" mean opposite things?
15. Why is \"phonics\" not spelled the way it sounds?
16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?
21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control
when you know the batteries are dead?
22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?
24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?
27. Christmas, what other time of the year do you sit in front of a
dead tree, and eat candy out of your socks?
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21 Dec 2009 15:49 #27198
by
Replied by on topic Re:Oxymorons
That was beautiful(wipes away a tear)
still giggling,where is the audiance sitting
:woohoo:
still giggling,where is the audiance sitting
:woohoo:
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21 Dec 2009 16:00 - 21 Dec 2009 16:01 #27199
by Jon
The author of the TOTJO simple and solemn oath, the liturgy book, holy days, the FAQ and the Canon Law. Ordinant of GM Mark and Master Jestor.
Replied by Jon on topic Re:Oxymorons
:woohoo: Great one Master Garm. You made it clear that life isn`t as simple as the words they describe. I`ll pass that on to my father, he`ll love that.
The author of the TOTJO simple and solemn oath, the liturgy book, holy days, the FAQ and the Canon Law. Ordinant of GM Mark and Master Jestor.
Last edit: 21 Dec 2009 16:01 by Jon.
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21 Dec 2009 18:30 #27202
by RyuJin
Quotes:
Out of darkness, he brings light. Out of hatred, love. Out of dishonor, honor-james allen-
He who has conquered doubt and fear has conquered failure-james allen-
The sword is the key to heaven and hell-Mahomet-
The best won victory is that obtained without shedding blood-Count Katsu-
All men's souls are immortal, only the souls of the righteous are immortal and divine -Socrates-
I'm the best at what I do, what I do ain't pretty-wolverine
J.L.Lawson,Master Knight, M.div, Eastern Studies S.I.G. Advisor (Formerly Known as the Buddhist Rite)
Former Masters: GM Kana Seiko Haruki , Br.John
Current Apprentices: Baru
Former Apprentices:Adhara(knight), Zenchi (knight)
Replied by RyuJin on topic Re:Oxymorons
28. why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
29. why do shipments go by car and cargo go by ships?
30. why do we say \"hold on\" when you can't really hold a word?
31. why do we call it \"a fly in the ointment\"?why was the fly in there, and what kind of ointment?
32. why are they called automobiles when we still have to control them?
29. why do shipments go by car and cargo go by ships?
30. why do we say \"hold on\" when you can't really hold a word?
31. why do we call it \"a fly in the ointment\"?why was the fly in there, and what kind of ointment?
32. why are they called automobiles when we still have to control them?
Warning: Spoiler!
There is passion, yet there is peace
Through passion I gain strength and knowledge
Through strength and knowledge I gain victory
Through victory I gain peace and harmony
Through peace and harmony my chains are broken
There is no death, there is the force and it shall free me
Through passion I gain strength and knowledge
Through strength and knowledge I gain victory
Through victory I gain peace and harmony
Through peace and harmony my chains are broken
There is no death, there is the force and it shall free me
Quotes:
Warning: Spoiler!
Out of darkness, he brings light. Out of hatred, love. Out of dishonor, honor-james allen-
He who has conquered doubt and fear has conquered failure-james allen-
The sword is the key to heaven and hell-Mahomet-
The best won victory is that obtained without shedding blood-Count Katsu-
All men's souls are immortal, only the souls of the righteous are immortal and divine -Socrates-
I'm the best at what I do, what I do ain't pretty-wolverine
J.L.Lawson,Master Knight, M.div, Eastern Studies S.I.G. Advisor (Formerly Known as the Buddhist Rite)
Former Masters: GM Kana Seiko Haruki , Br.John
Current Apprentices: Baru
Former Apprentices:Adhara(knight), Zenchi (knight)
Please Log in to join the conversation.