Anger and revenge urges

More
20 May 2017 02:20 #284630 by Ghost warrior
I need guidance in this matter some people close to me have really wrong me. I'm trying to let it go. I'm​ really needing some tips on anger.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Aqua

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

  • Arisaig
  • Arisaig's Avatar
  • Guest
20 May 2017 02:34 #284631 by Arisaig
Replied by Arisaig on topic Anger and revenge urges
My advise, through much guidance from people around the Temple and advise I've seen given here, it is to simply step back and regroup.

Take a step back from the situation and look at it objectively. How bad is it really, in the grand scheme of things? Is this wrong worth more than your friendship to you? If not, forgive and move on. If it is, perhaps you must consider cutting a toxic ties with these people.

Of course, that is a last resort method. This wrong would have to be so extreme that you see no reason to be with them anymore, sacrificing your friendship and bond.

To regroup would also mean to gather information about the event, not just your side of the story, but theirs as well. Ask them why they did it. Be kind, be gentle. "A gentle answer turns away wrath". Don't assume their motivations, ask them, see if it was just misconstrued by you, and make the decision to forgive them or move on.

As for anger, I can say once more what I've already said. The above method works wonders in most situations.

And then for revenge, your need for revenge can be fuelled by your anger at yourself. Are you angry at yourself? Why do you feel it justified to take revenge for this?

A Jedi knows when to act and when not to. Take a step back, think, and move forward.

May the Force be with you either way you go.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
20 May 2017 02:35 #284632 by OB1Shinobi
Replied by OB1Shinobi on topic Anger and revenge urges
Youll have to be more specific: who are they, what did they do, and what are you thinking?

You can PM if you prefer- but public discourse allows for multiple perspectives which can be good for producing wider range of plausible ideas

My heroes had the heart to lose their lives out on a limb
And all I remember is thinking, I want to be like them

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
20 May 2017 02:47 #284633 by JamesSand
Replied by JamesSand on topic Anger and revenge urges
Do you actually have the ability and resources to carry out your desired revenge / acts of anger?

If not, No problem ;)

If yes - Are the consequences worth it?

If not, No problem ;)

If Yes - ah, well I can't officially recommend revenge, so perhaps get some exercise, eat a healthy meal, see something new, and then reassess the situation?

If it still boils your blood after that, we can try talking it out?

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
20 May 2017 03:06 #284634 by vladucard
Replied by vladucard on topic Anger and revenge urges
We are having an issue with a member of our family that is giving us trust issues. We are doing our best to approach it in a non-confrontacial (is that a word? Lol) kind of way but he's making it hard. The best way we can get our "revenge" is to go about it the legal way. In reality, it isn't really "revenge" because that would go against the Jedi beliefs I am working on keeping, I see it as a way of getting rid of the situation without any personal feelings involved but in a way that will fix the issue once and for all.

I would say try to talk it out first and see what happens. If that doesn't help, perhaps the best thing to do is give each other space until you are able to speak about it without anger. It's hard, I know, I've been there, but trying to resolve any issue calmly will have better results.

Good luck and may the force guide you in these tough times.

"Breathe deep....and live it" - Arisaig
Teaching Master: Senan

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
21 May 2017 18:41 - 21 May 2017 18:42 #284744 by Aqua
Replied by Aqua on topic Anger and revenge urges

Ghost warrior wrote: I need guidance in this matter some people close to me have really wrong me. I'm trying to let it go. I'm​ really needing some tips on anger.


You can always PM one of the (Ordained) Clergy. Ordained Clergy are Deacons, Priests, and Bishops here. They are people of trust and great chat partners even if you are not religious. :)

~

www.templeofthejediorder.org/31-clergy/695-clergy

Inclino, Tolero, Speculum
Last edit: 21 May 2017 18:42 by Aqua.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
21 May 2017 19:24 #284748 by Zenchi
Replied by Zenchi on topic Anger and revenge urges
I've dealt with anger my entire life, I think I can help you with that. Pm me if you need to chew...

My Word is my Honor, and my Honor is my Life ~ Sturm Brightblade
Passion, yet Serenity
Knighted Apprentice Arisaig
TM- RyuJin

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
21 May 2017 22:16 #284763 by Rosalyn J
Replied by Rosalyn J on topic Anger and revenge urges
Hiya,

Talking through the issue may assist in taking some of the bite out of it. This may assist: www.templeofthejediorder.org/sermons/236...ense-live-sermon-log

I and others are available via PM :)
The following user(s) said Thank You: Zenchi, vladucard

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
21 May 2017 23:30 #284767 by Manu
Replied by Manu on topic Anger and revenge urges
I am also available to talk if you want to PM. I'm no doctor, nor expert, but I can be a friend if you feel like talking.

The truth is something that burns. It burns off dead wood. And people don't like having the dead wood burnt off, often because they're 95 percent dead wood. - Jordan Peterson

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.