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I like and admire your logic, if you have time please p m me,vidian....

Figure out what it is and just do it, I for one am really bad at putting things off and always dream about something that I COULD do rather than actually doing it, however, on the odd occasions that I actually manage to do it, it's very satisfying.

also you say that you want to take control of your "appearance and the way I present my myself". You shouldn't shed weight or pull on some expensive clothes to hide some sort of inner fear or uncertainty, however, most of the people here seem to quite comfortable with themselves. As such I would say there is nothing wrong with splashing out a bit, you can attack things for being materialistic or self-conscious but if you have nothing to hide and are happy with yourself, I don't see that you would be buying those things or doing that exercise as compensation for anything else.

I feel like i'm rambling and not being particularly helpful..so i'll stop now

Thank you Mace for your input.

I have started today by a nice long walk with a dear friend. I have taken my 6 bottles of wine and bottle of gin out of the house and stashed them in the shed fridge. (in the hope of OUT OF SIGHT OUT OF MIND)

Though we are at a family BBQ today and I know I'll have a drink, I shall also be partaking of soft drinks too.

My middle daughter has a partner that she's off and on again with and I know that his lack of commitment to our gran daughter is a contributing factor as to my state of mind. Hence I have said he is NOT to be in mine and my husbands life. This person likes the title of DADDY but not the JOB.

Small steps to start with....... My road to change has commenced....

Good for you. One thing to remember: If you slip backwards don't look on it as a failure and give up (as I have witnessed many times). Consider if you succeed for 5 days and then go to pieces on the 6th you haven't failed, you have still succeeded for 5/6 of the time. Try for 6 out of 7 next time. Just try for more 'good' days than 'bad' and try to increase the number of 'good'. Small steps. Every second is a new begining.

Today I am going to for a 3 mile walk with 2 friends. I drank last but that was to unforeseen events that pushed me just one step to far. But back on the road to change today. I am just going to give myself small targets and go from there.

So today is a long walk and no carbs with proteins. Lets see how this day progresses.

Thats 3 mile walk felt like 5 miles. I am shattered but gonna do the same again tomorrow.

This is inspiring! Thank you for sharing your journey with us, Mistress!

I have embraced the day ahead. Though the weather isn't completely a beautiful summers day I intend to brace forward with the challenge ahead.

3 mile walk, with good friends and I know great topics of decussion... Slagging off both their ex husbands.... (well they'll be talking, I'll just be calming the ladies tempers down)....

Bloody windy, out on the ridge this morning. Our walk was indeed challenging but must have done me some good coz I'm sssssooooooooo very hungry now....

This is very good you are doing this. You are replacing an unhealthy habit with a healthy one, and changing things in your environment to help support this change.