This sermon was written by and published for Robert McKinney - Archon

 

Finding Assistance
by Robert McKinney

The last couple weeks have been difficult for me. You see, every year during the month of April I enter a state of angry depression. I have always assumed that it was because of my deployment to Iraq in April of 2004. For years I have fought my way through the depression, oftentimes by staying home from work or isolating myself from everyone. This year, I thought I had worked through the depression. I started to feel that I was making progress, letting go of the anger and depression. It was on the 10th anniversary of landing in Iraq that made it all rush back.

The week before I had ran into a few of the soldiers I deployed with. We talked about the good times we had before leaving for Iraq and the party we had when we made it home. We didn’t, however, speak one word about being in country. It was still a sore spot for all of us. We talked for a couple of hours, oftentimes with long silences accompanied with staring into the past. We don’t get together very often because it dredges up memories of a past we would rather forget.

On the 10th anniversary I realized about halfway through the day that I was intensely angry. My coworkers mentioned that I was not myself, and instead of making matters worse I checked myself out of work and went home. I spent the rest day thinking about why I was so angry.

The answer didn’t come right away. An hour went by with no success. Another hour made the anger worse out of frustration. It was during the third hour that my wife came in, immediately noticing that I was home early and obviously upset. We talked about my anger and frustrations. It was my wife that found the heart of the issue.

I was still guilty about leaving my family behind.

I don’t believe that I would have made the jump on my own. It took my comrades from Iraq to draw the anger to the surface, my coworkers to force me to see it, and my wife to help me see it through. The people around you can help you in your own quest for self-discovery. Oftentimes the people around you are the very guides you need to find the next step. As you journey forward in your own search, look into the reason others are around you, and for the reason you are around them. Self-discovery often has very little to do with self, and oftentimes requires others to discover.

Comments (6)

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Very true. Sometimes you just need to see yourself from the perspective of others. Thank you for the reminder.

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Very Wise lad. I have no proper words to express my feelings toward this. All I can say is thank you for sharing with us and letting us learn from your experience.

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So many people tend to forget what sort of trials military members go through when they return and are thrust back into the chaos of civilian life. It took me months to adjust, and even now (16 years later) I still find myself baffled at the...

So many people tend to forget what sort of trials military members go through when they return and are thrust back into the chaos of civilian life. It took me months to adjust, and even now (16 years later) I still find myself baffled at the behavior of civvies. I even have conversations about it with other veterans (both older ones, and recently discharged ones) that come into where I work. You'd be surprised at how similar ww2, vietnam, korea, ds, ef veterans reactions are....I see it all the time...the trailing off at the end of their thought, the distant stare, the disturbed silence...

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Sometimes the only way to let go is by seeing it through someone else's eyes who know.<br />How does one let go, what they are unaware of holding onto?<br />Thank you for the sermon.<br />I am reminded of the first of sixteen teachings...<br...

Sometimes the only way to let go is by seeing it through someone else's eyes who know.<br />How does one let go, what they are unaware of holding onto?<br />Thank you for the sermon.<br />I am reminded of the first of sixteen teachings...<br />May the force be with you! :-)

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Really well said. Yesterday I spent the day talking with Disabled American Veterans.<br /><br />There is a lot of frustration, anger, mixed emotions. Add to that the current VA stuff is not helping our veterans deal with the things they...

Really well said. Yesterday I spent the day talking with Disabled American Veterans.<br /><br />There is a lot of frustration, anger, mixed emotions. Add to that the current VA stuff is not helping our veterans deal with the things they endured.<br /><br />It takes others, helping, talking and just being with these heroes to help them through these times.<br /><br />I am still on active duty, inot my 29th year and I am trying to get a better understanding of the process to help others navigate the bureaucracy, and the more I look into it the more I realize how confusing it all is and it is no wonder so many Veterans give up on the VA process.<br /><br />Most of the veterans I talk with find true peace through talking with other veterans who have similar experiences, using the DAV/VFW etc.<br /><br />Know that you are not alone and there are many Jedi military veterans out here that can be talked with to help ease our transitions to civilian life. I know I will need it too when the time comes.

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Oif 8 9 & 10 here...thank u so much for the words of help. big strong guys don't need help... big tough soldiers survive war, they don't have feelings...and yet here we are, still trying to become normal.my wife and family have helped me s great...

Oif 8 9 & 10 here...thank u so much for the words of help. big strong guys don't need help... big tough soldiers survive war, they don't have feelings...and yet here we are, still trying to become normal.my wife and family have helped me s great deal after the war and today as well. I think the ones who truly love us should be told thank.you and take the focus off of us and help them. This helps me, helping others

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