The thread of self-forgiveness

I forgive myself for the monster I have allowed myself to be. I have worked for a long time to be better. I will not be that man again.

I forgive myself for being the only thing standing in the way of my becoming who I want to be.

I forgive myself for not being ready to forgive myself for my financial short comings.

I forgive myself for not doing what is best for me. I will do my best to make sure that I do what I need to so I can excel.

I forgive myself for being childish in my ways. I forgive myself for committing unspeakable acts against my fellow man. I forgive myself for taking gulit that was not my own. I forgive myself for all the fear, worrying, hate, and suffering I have inflicted. I forgive myself.

I forgive me for still being negative against myself. I forgive me for not reaching out sooner to myself. I forgive me for not being there for myself, for not showing up to life. I forgive me for holding myself back.

For sometimes not being a Jedi at all. For allowing others to push me away from things I love and letting their narrow opinions and uninformed assumptions of me affect how I feel about myself and the decisions I've made in the past. For not trusting myself enough... and for sometimes wording myself so poorly I upset other people in the process. For not being able to open up and let people in... for being so afraid of messing up and taking others down with me that I can't let anyone close anymore. Craving connection so badly while at the same time isolating myself on purpose. And I've allowed it all to happen. I only have myself to blame.

I forgive myself for feeling sad about certain recent happenings.

I forgive you for wanting to run. Thank you for staying.

I forgive myself for being perfect even thought it makes others jealous.